SHOCKED AND APPALLED

Well, apparently I had quite the wrong end of the stick when it comes to my breakup.  The full venting is located on my double-secret probation blog, but I have to say something here, too.

Question: Is it normal, a mere five days after breaking up with someone you have purported to respect and care about for the past twelve years, to go on a date with the new girl at work?  And then to go on several more after that, with no intention of stopping?

Is it normal to take her to a party with all of your friends and family, less than two full weeks after said breakup?

What kind of a person DOES that?

Moving on is part of life, and screws fall out all the time---the world is an imperfect place.  I get that.  I was planning on moving on myself, after a decent amount of time had passed.

His dating a girl (whom, logic dictates, was essentially waiting in the wings) so quickly is just ugly, and mean, and disrespectful, and cold, and it means that I can never be friends with him again.

I can't be friends with someone who values and respects me so little, and is so unaware that his recent actions serve mostly to humiliate me in front of all of our friends.

I don't even want to know someone like that.

Which is going to be really awkward for all our friends.  Sorry in advance, guys, but it's not my fault---this one is all on him.  I have suffered the many and varied shades of his idiocy for a long time now, and willingly.  I was willing because I loved him, and I had faith in him to be more careful with me than he's been with past girlfriends.  Because it's me.

But I'm just not capable of getting over this last bit.

I AM SO SMART

I AM SO SMART

S-M-R-T

Given that this was the first time I've played bar trivia since the team name "Trent Lott's Dreaming of a White Christmas" was socially relevant, I'm going to go ahead and do a happy dance for my part in winning 2nd place and a $50 gift card to a downtown bar tonight :D

YAY TRIVIA!

Poor Slow Domo

Good Lord am I out of shape.  I'm ashamed to say I had to get off the bike and walk for a little ways up a hill this evening.

But at least I went riding!  It was fun, for the most part, and I think I'll stick to some less hilly parts of the neighborhood until I'm in a bit better shape.  I'm gonna be sore as hell tomorrow.

Little bit worried about weird sounds the chain is making.  I'm going to have to get one or more of my bike-wizard friends to take a look at it.  I hate the idea of something being wrong with my shiny new toy, but I'm sure it's nothing too serious. 

Between that and the 18,000 errands I ran this weekend, I am one dog-tired Domo.  Buenas noches a todos.

I GOT THE BIKE!

It's the best, I love it.  I'm a little worried that it seems to skip gear 7 when going down from 8; it just skips right over to 6.  But over time I'll learn how to fix little things like that, and in the meantime it's just awesome.

It's in the shed right now, because obvs I'm not going to leave a gorgeous piece of machinery like that out in the elements, to get stolen or rained on or pooped on by birds.  It's safe and sound in my shed, looking purple and pretty and so ready to ride. 

I've got my ridiculously padded bike shorts, I've got my helmet, I've got my water bottle and the arm band for my iPod.  Let the working out begin :)

In small doses, at first, but going further and further before I know it!

BIKE BIKE BIKE!

I AM GETTING A BIKE!

It is purple and beautiful and sooooooooo comfortable.

LOOK HOW PRETTY!!!

I was a little bummed out in my initial searching, because it seemed like the only bikes that were cute were also useless unless you live directly on Key West.  They don't have gears, they're heavy as hell and while there's plenty of room for a basket to carry your organic, locally grown produce home from the Farmers' Market, there's no way in hell you're getting up a hill without dismounting and walking the f*cker.  My friends and I decided that maybe that's why hipsters are so skinny---they're riding their damned heavy Cruisers all over creation because they can't bring themselves to buy a car.

So while I'd found a hybrid that was plenty pretty (in a silver, MacBook kind of way) and felt good to ride, I was super-psyched when I first laid eyes on the gorgeous piece of aluminum you see up there.  It'll take me on roads, dirt trails and gravel trails, and while it won't be good for deep-woods Off-roading, I don't intend to do any of that because yuck.  If I'm deep in the woods, I better be sitting on my ass in front of a roaring fire with a beer in my hand and some steak in my belly.

I hemmed and hawed over the purple one vs. the silver one, but really I'm in love with the purple one.  I will go to rescue it from the suspiciously laid-back salesgirl either Friday or Saturday, and I will then proceed to burn up the road around my house.  At least, the surrounding block or two, at first, until I get used to it.  It's quite hilly around here.

Oh!  And I've lost 4.5 pounds since Monday a week ago.  I honestly couldn't tell you how except that maybe breakups are slimming?

Double-Secret Probation

Got another blog.  I'm keeping that one a secret so I can chronicle my breakup in peace and not clutter up this original blog with all that business.

Every minute of every day

People break up all the time. We were always going to break up, it was a given.  But even with that given, I'm going to have to grieve. 

I am so very sad here, at the inevitable end of my relationship.  We will always be friends but I can't begin to imagine how much I'm going to miss everything that has always made us more than friends.  Formalizing it made it...well, formal.  But it was always there, and now I just don't know where it will go. 

I am deeply, deeply sad.

He followed me all the way home just to make sure I got here okay.

And now for the mourning!

Life rarely sucks as much as when you face the End of something, especially something you cherished.

John Dies At The End

Go out and get it right now.  This book rocked my world and it'll rock yours too, due to its unstoppable awesomeness and outright weirditude.  David Wong is my new hero.

I'm addicted to Cracked.com, so I put DW's book on my list of "Want!" for my birthday last fall.  The Kimmie came through, but I've just now gotten around to reading it and DUDE was it worth the wait!  Doesn't matter that it's in hardcover, the part where John tells David how the wig monster once stole his corndog makes it completely 100% worth every penny you'd spend on it.

But what I think I love best about the book is how the story of its genesis has inspired me to really start writing again, at least a little bit every day, until an idea takes off and I can run with it.  David Wong was just a cube-dweller like anyone else, writing weird stories in his spare time, and now he has a freaking book and people have bought it and it's being turned into a movie. 

When I come to die, I want there to be an honest-to-God book out there with my name on it, and I want more than just my immediately family and closest friends to have read it.  And if that's going to happen, I gotta get to writing.  So in addition to being a kick-ass read from start to finish, John Dies at the End might actually have changed my life.

A few things I've written:

http://www.cracked.com/funny-1808-the-southern-vampire-mysteries/
http://www.cracked.com/funny-2075-office-space/